This is a high-level overview of what’s gone on during the three months I have ignored y’all. It is a list of the people with whom I have Had Things To Do or maybe just makeouts, and a brief description of the event. Descending order of chronology, as best I can recall.
- That One Dude – drunk, kind of ehh but I’m willing to give it another go cause he’s cute and nerdy
- Abrasive Dude With Whom I Once Worked – not exactly drunk, a+++ would make out with again
- My Future Husband – sober-ish, phenom, long overdue
- Mr. Hickory – drunk most of the times, pretty okay, but we just kind of lost interest
- The Buff Bengali – drunk, not very good, and he was pushy and I had to threaten him
- The Sad Puppy – drunk, but he had just fixed some jewelry of mine for me and i was feeling grateful
- The Face – sort of drunk, but exhilarated at immediate success in picking up a dude after a really obnoxious and dramatic public incident with…
- My Little Brother’s Former Boarding School Roommate – well, it’s a long story. I’ll get to it.
- The Englishman – vacation at Hedonism II, drunk, he is ENGLISH
- The White Jamaican – vacation at Hedonism II, drunk, a fine specimen of a man and quite the gentleman as well, a+++ would make out with again, I even tried to find him after I left to exchange contact information
- Legal By A Thread – vacation at Hedonism II, drunk, it was his 18th birthday
- The Bronx Lawyer – vacation at Hedonism II, drunk, really gorgeous man, it was ok
I went out once with The Physicist, but it was excruciating and we did not make out. I kissed this one guy who works for another company in my office building after crashing his office party, but it was more of a goodnight kiss and not so much a makeout. This is a funny story. I’m not going to tell it right now, though. I also propositioned one waiter and had a mild-to-moderate crush on a completely separate waiter.
I think that’s it.
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