This is gonna be a boring one, so feel free to skip it. Last night, I opted to stay in and keep myself out of trouble. Had a few invitations come in: bowling and a party with LBHF’s roommate, drinks out with Bar Dude, drinks in with the Seminary Student, pubcrawling with brother and some of his friends. Declined, all, in favor of Count Duckula and self-reflection.
{April 16, 2009}
That Little Tramp.
LBHF is going out this evening to drink with someone that I think is a girl he mentioned dating before we started seeing each other. As I told EIB, I’m going to be very cranky if LBHF puts out. She is not cute.
I’m trying to find someone to go with me to get a Vortex slutburger, but so far the only person who is interested is The Seminary Student, and I just don’t want to see him again so soon. I don’t know if I want to see him again at all, actually. I’m seriously bruised today, and my failing to find it at all sexy indicates to me that the physical chemistry between us remains absent. I also have beard-burn on my nipples, and it’s really uncomfortable.
I really do have the beginnings of carpal tunnel today, and this time I’m not just being melodramatic. A sad state of affairs indeed.
{April 15, 2009}
Whores: What Are They Good For?
Brought The Seminary Student back to my place. Informed him ahead of time that pants were not coming off. This is not just a standard deflection, my friends- I intensely loathe his full beard and told him as much. Normally, facial hair alone is a non-negotiable for me, but cmon, he speaks Latin and ancient Greek. He read Catullus aloud to me while I liberally (and crassly) translated along. It was very hot, until he started smearing his yucky beard on my face.
He was pleasantly aggressive, but he told me that his personal rules involved no penile-vaginal penetration outside of the confines of a committed relationship. We both agreed that we did not see potential for such a relationship in each other, but apparently he feels that there is more to pursue. I’m ambivalent on the subject. Now it is the end of the night, and I am fully topless while pants remain intact.
Overall, the night remains fully disappointing. A high note is my brand-new English Internet Boyfriend (EIB), about whom I’m sure to post more later. Sadly, I think he’s currently either sleeping or snowballing birds, and is thus unavailable to respond to any lewdness I might fling in his direction. Sheer tragedy, my friends. This carpal tunnel is not healing itself.
{April 15, 2009}
Misbehaving with The Seminary Student
An excerpt, for your reading pleasure:
The Seminary Student: i’m feeling fairly um straight forward at the moment myself
Anterior Motive: care to elaborate?
The Seminary Student: well… you see… “straight forward” was thinly veiled reference to my very erect cock
Anterior Motive: i know, i was pressing for further detail
Anterior Motive: i might be drunk, but i’m not retarded
The Seminary Student: what detail would you like?
The Seminary Student: about how I’m actually lying naked in my bed at the moment?
{April 15, 2009}
Oops
To numb the near-unbearable sexual compulsions I’d been experiencing, I decided to drink several white russians last night. Although this did aid in my ability to sit still without fidgeting, it did cloud my judgement to such an extent that, at some point, naughtychat with The Seminary Student seemed like a good idea. Whoops. It was moderately scandalous and I’m sure that I’ll have to deal with the fallout at some point in the not-so-distant future. I’m not sure that I want to have a sexual relationship with him, as the only time we went out previously there was an abject lack of any physical chemistry whatsoever. He’s kind of a dirty bitch, which is pretty hot, but I just don’t know. Maybe this whole temporary nymphomania is just a horomonal anomaly and I’ll get over it soon. I sincerely hope that’s the case, as things are bound to get messy otherwise.
I may update later to provide some highlights of the conversation, but I’m now running extremely late and must get my ass in gear.
{February 21, 2009}
The Seminary Student
Met on Match.com. He is a doctoral theology student who also teaches at a local seminary. We got along well via email and chat, so I was looking forward to meeting him.
He’s not really my normal physical type; although he was tall enough at 6’3″ (+10), he is definitely not deliciously muscled (-20). He also has facial hair (-15), which I have never liked. However, he speaks both Latin (+50) and ancient Greek (+50). Also, as a seminary student, he is a Biblical scholar(+20) – and the Bible and study thereof are among my own less conventional interests.
We met up at a bar in L5P to get to know each other better. Although it hadn’t come across in our phone conversations, he ended up having a really bad stutter that obviously distressed him (-20), which was moderately off-putting. He wore a suit (+10), with a royal purple shirt (-15). We had good talk; he and I share a dry and sarcastic sense of humor (+25), and he shocked the hell out of me when he broke out the dead baby jokes (+20). I think I taught him a few new ones. We even share several nerdly interests, including but not limited to a near-obsession with Buffy the Vampire Slayer (+30).
Sadly, he is a student living on a stipend, not otherwise employed (-20) and the poorness inherent in such a situation is a turn-off for me. Also, it came up late in conversation that he doesn’t think that animals have souls (-100) and expects that dogs have no place in a Christian Heaven. That made me very sad.
Although we stayed out talking for a few hours longer than I’d intended, there was absolutely no spark (-∞), and even though he might end up wearing one of those hot priest collars (+100) within a year or so, I just don’t see it going anywhere.
New friend, yes- but no potential for hot sexin’ or romance.
Final score: (-∞) + (+105)
